Monday, November 25, 2013

It's a Pissah

Well, probably gonna be here a while yet - my doctor says somewhere towards the end of next week that she'll probably send me home.

So, this is the story.

I definitely broke my middle toe, and I just had another CT scan to determine if I'd broken something in the arch of my foot. I just cannot put any weight on it without it screaming at me not do do that. The local podiatrist suspected there would be some fluid buildup with an infection, so he numbed 'er up and did some poking and he was right. Had quite a bit of fluid. I've also got an infection on my shins that is often part of problem edema. They've got an IV port on me and shove two different antibiotics through.

My right foot just appears to be sore with a gash on the big toe. It's healing up nicely. I'm also on massive amounts of diuretics, which have been introduced intravenously. The same diuretics in pill form have let me down, but if ya shoot 'em up, they work great.

Which brings me to the worst part - the damn catheter. I hate 'em. Feel like ya gotta "go" when what you really wanna do is pee the damn thing out. I'm on number two bag - one developed a leak. Guess it had been leaving a hard life.

So, I can't walk, can't pee normally, and am pretty well bedridden.

Someone tried to call the room phone earlier today. Pshaw. After I've dropped the bed, squeezed the boys sliding across the blanket, and obtaining an Act of Congress to move, the phone would have quit ringing.

Long story short - I ain't gonna answer that thing. I've got a cell phone within reach, and if you can't call on that, I don't have the ability to answer a landline.

Thirty years ago, I'd think part of my treatment would have been pretty damn cool, but not so much now. I speak of Percocet. Jeebus Kee Riste is that shit powerful. It's about all I can do to stay awake, much less pay much attention to anything else. I sure as hell don't hurt - which is a good thing. These damn beds are so not supportive - I've got dangly bits and limbs going to sleep all the time.

They wanted me to use a sort of air pressured circulatory "socks" and I did try 'em. Sticky, clammy and then I really am rooted to bed, because those damn things have to be disconnected to get out. Sometimes, I just like to sit on the edge of the bed, and that about requires help. I hate having to use that call button as well - I know they're pretty busy and my wanting a diet pop is pretty low on their totem poles.

But I can't get out on my feet just yet.

And I've been taking off a ton of water - for some reason my weight isn't dropping as fast, but they can only push my kidneys so far. Earlier, I had some pretty severe cramps in my left arm - the first time lasted about fifteen minutes, but the second time was close to three hours. I just had to give up trying to straighten that hand out. All I could do was watch it writhe and twist into new and artistic shapes. But, my potassium and magnesium dosages have increased considerably, which seems to have done the trick.

I'm sure that after I'm dismissed, I'll be headed to an appointment with a weight loss clinic in Wichita. My concerns about being unable to go there two and three times a week appear to be unfounded - apparently they all use Skype for their conferences.

We shall see, eh?


threecollie said...

Aw, man, I sure feel for you. Hope everything resolves asap.

Jess said...

I can only wish the best and say some prayers. Consider both done and keep up the good fight.

drjim said...

Ho-lee shit, Jeff!

Well, I'm glad you're getting proper treatment.

I'll add a prayer for you on my list tonight.

Take care, buddy!

SteveK said...

What an ordeal for you, Jeff! Keeping my fingers crossed that your Dr. lets you leave the hospital even sooner. Sure hope you don't have to spend Thanksgiving there!

All the best,
Cousin Steve

Anonymous said...

Oh, Jeffro. Hold on, hold on despite all this uncomfortableness (is that a word?). You gotta get better.
Remember - you have a raincheck on a walk around Manhattan, you promised!

If you're able to read (on phone or Kindle, etc), let me know. I got a fresh crunchy paycheck, and I can now buy things (like e-books on Amazon...) for my friends.

CGHill said...

I was going to say that this sort of thing sucks this time of year, but there really isn't any time of year when it doesn't suck.

Hope you get out of there in time to go dancing or something.

Lisa Paul said...

Jeez, what an ordeal. Heal fast. And keep up the good attitude. I'm amazed you aren't...well...more pissed off.