Uh Oh

Trouble in Paradise. Apparently Daddy has to hide out from an increasingly discordant Mommy. The proof is that Jeffy is accustomed to this and "hidin' from Mommy" is now a family wide behavior. Just think of the fresh comic gold if they separated, or split and divorced! Mommy and Daddy start dating again, but with these little morons along for the ride!

No, no, you won't have to worry abut that, Dolly. The old Motorola Startac flip phones were smarter than you. I'm quite sure this will not change.

The first gay plugger. Things have changed since the seventies - "good buddy" now means homosexual lover and it's a derogatory term. So our canine trucker is either cruising for a bruising, or talking to his significant male other.

In this old Hi and Lois strip we see why there were no more kids after Dot and Ditto.

There Are Days

Yannow, even if Miss Arbiter In All Things and General Know It All doesn't like it much, Billy is just being practical here. Just take yer dolly and go cry to Mommy. You know you wanna.

Poor Jeffy. He doesn't have much going on upstairs already - he's halfway to the back of the short bus on natural talent to begin with. What he doesn't need is to have smoke blown up his arse by his know it all sister. And what is really scary - for Jeffy to be an uncle, that means at least one of his siblings must procreate. Let's hope it's PJ - he's shown little signs of idiocy, or much of anything up to this point. There still may be hope yet.

To be honest here, Jeffy, I'm for thinking that even if you were in your teenage years this game might be beyond your ken. Sorry.

There is another possibility. He can read the box well enough to know he's too young, but he cannot master tying his own shoes. Perhaps he's been sandbagging it all along. It's a long shot, and I'd highly doubt it, but ya never know.

Kudos to Dennis - nailed it in one!

Yowza! This strip's setup took a hard turn to the left, and it was not good. Not good at all.

Unanimous decision for Loretta this round? I think so.

Funky Winkerbean is probably the most unfunny "humor" comic there is. Angst, remorse, general black moodiness, self recrimination, self doubt, you name it - these people are sick in the head. They can turn a sunny day gray.

But Funky sure as hell didn't deserve the total lack of respect that this gal is displaying towards her erstwhile customer. I say erstwhile, because she'd get an earful from me while I was on my way to the front desk for a refund and to bitch to management as well.  That's gone way beyond wry and dry and well into insulting, if ya ask me.

Yannow, I really, really like Zits. I'd not have Walt and Connie's patience when it comes to Jeremy's attitude. If I'd been that big of a smartass with my Dad, I might still be talking out of the side of my head instead of the front - he'd have walloped me right then and there. It wouldn't hurt Jeremy to show his parents some respect once in a blue moon.

Moral Equivalence

Jimmie Margulies can bit my arse. Better yet, move to Syria.

Because, Gawd knows, trans fats are morally equal to the freaking poisonous gas Syria used on it's own people. Get it? Our society is morally corrupt for allowing the usage of the killer trans fats. Yep, I bet if you sprayed trans fats on the general populace, it would kill 'em dead right there. Just like poison gas.

And so that also means that our society here in the good ol' US of A is not all that, so the so called American Exceptionalism ain't for real. Just ignore all the positive things our society has managed to do for the world over the past couple hundred years - all the life, labor and quality of living inventions and medical cures, procedures, medicines, managing to feed ourselves and the world cheaply - none of that matters.

Because we have allowed trans fats to be used. Just like Syria's poisonous gas.

Got it?

Best

Out of all the cartoons I read today, this one is the best. Alice rarely needs her Fist Of Death much these days.

After All These Years

We all knew it was coming. Thel finally snapped. "Dolly is sleeping now. Dolly will sleep forever."

Now I dunno about y'all, but this ain't funny. This strip is just plain disgusting.

Made Me Feel All Warm And Runny

There is justice in this world. Rat gets what is coming to him.

With Apologies.....

...to Robert Frost and M. Scott Peck......

G.R.O.S.S.

I'm feeling like crap, I'm fat and lazy, and it's my birthday. So I'm not very creative. So, here is a complete Calvin and Hobbes story arc.

I think we can safely assume that Suzie has Calvin's number, regardless of his high opinion of his own intellect. It's strips like this that made me a comics nut so many years ago.

Yowza!

EULAs just keep getting tougher!

Future Meteorologist???

Dolly?

I'm thinking not.

Just sayin.'

Man, I Gotta Tell Ya

I find it difficult to disagree with Ted Rall here. He's not been happy with Hope and Change for quite some time, and originally for different reasons than conservatives, but it's hard to not side with him on this issue.

NOTICE

The comic strip Crankshaft came to an unexpected end today.

Well, we can hope so anyways.

Yeah, Sure.

Get off Hagar's a$$, Helga. People in glass houses, etc. Remember you own a pet duck.

Sorry. Not buying this premise. Billy understands graduation and what is going on just by the visuals on television, and he doesn't know about mortarboards, tassels and robes? I realize he is the product of public education, but still. If Jeffy had said it, I'd could believe that.

Sunday Funnies

Been a while since I've done one of these, so here goes!

Nice to know the order of importance in Our Dear Leader's head.

Pretty much.

At least Crankshaft won't be driving the bus with actual children anymore until his broken arms heal.

As y'all probably know, I have little use for Jeff Danziger. However, even he sees that the jobs market is screwed.

 

As I was reading this I feared that the comics page would just never be the same. Turns out Marmaduke "marks" things differently than other dogs. Whew!

Turns out Snoopy is a stinking sellout. Of course, we've had clues (coff, coff, Metlife, coff). No surprise.

 Couldn't not post a Calvin and Hobbes Classic, now could I? Calvin shows he has a firm grasp on modern business principles.

Great. Just Great.

After all these years, we find that Alexander is a pedophile.

A glimpse of some Future Farmers of America? Not quite. More like future meth addicts of America. Chocolate was only a gateway to the "good stuff" for this bunch. Filthy, drooling, longing for their fix - not much of a future here.