Thursday, April 24, 2008

Promiscuity

Steve H. has an excellent post on the effects promiscuity has on individuals and society today. I was looking to cut some quotes and post them here, but you should really go read the whole thing, as they say.

I couldn't agree more. I'm celibate these days. It's a choice, but for me, it's a choice based on the cost of the experience. Sex is great. Sex is like pizza: even bad sex is good. Regular sex does a body good.

But, for my part, it doesn't do any good at all when it is outside a healthy relationship. I found out early that one night stands weren't for me. I vastly prefer emotional attachment. Satiating my horniness by using (and probably being used by) a woman seems more like mutual masturbation to me. I can do that all on my own, without the baggage involved with a relationship sure to fail, because sex is all that holds it together.

Most of my failed relationships were also because I could not trust my partner. Most were obvious. Lying and cheating were the two biggies. I'm certainly one for introspection, so I often wonder if I'm choosing to fail, so I subconsciously pick women that can't be trusted. Plus, the older I get, the less I feel like going through the initial give and take of a beginning relationship, particularly since my experience has shown more give on my part and take on the other side. I find myself sympathizing with Strother Martin in Rooster Cogburn: the reason why I took this job is because the only person I like is me . Heh.

So, I guess I'm weird. Even kids in grade school here out on the prairie are sexually active. If a girl goes out on a date and doesn't give oral sex, she is shunned. Oh, not all the kids are that way, but the "popular" ringleaders are. Oh yeah, to be a rebel you have to conform to the standard of no standards at all, like everyone else. Sexually transmitted diseases are at an all time high. And why use birth control, when you can have the offending matter sucked right out? It's just offending matter, after all. It's offensive because it interferes with the self absorbed lifestyle that we should be attaining. It's not a potential human. If you think that the fetus is human, you are obviously a anti-abortion religious terrorist.

One of the best articles about abortion was written by an atheist: Rachel Lucas. It's a fairly long read, but well worth it. The debate in the comments was also very forthright and illuminating. Surprisingly, the discourse was extremely polite and focused. I used to be on the fence. I used to think it was wrong, but I couldn't tell you how to live your life. I couldn't in good conscience use abortion as a form of convenient birth control. Now, I've changed. It's morally wrong. I'm speaking to the inconvenient pregnancies that common sense and personal responsibility could have prevented. I'm not going to change anyone's mind, and no one is going to change mine, either.

Steve pretty well covers the downward spiral of people caught in the trap that indulgences take people to - how normal sex isn't appealing enough. Of course, I haven't even touched on illegitimacy and it's attendant problems. Steve covers that far better than I could.

As an aside, that is part of the problem with blogging - someone is always a far better writer. I read their scribblings and find myself agreeing completely, not having the ability to say it as well or with as much levity or brevity. Not that I'm in any kind of contest - it just seems I'm capable of being a good spectator, occasionally joining in the fray. The fun thing about all of this is that this is a pretty small world we occupy, and there are giants among us who we rub shoulders with on a daily basis.

There isn't an easy solution to the problems enumerated here. A return to fifties style morality isn't going to work. We tend to look on those days with rose colored glasses - remember, segregation was still king, and women were pretty well stuck in the home. This problem with our sexuality is wound up with a lot of the "Great Society" and the multi generational devotees to entitlements that have no familial structure. Our entertainment providers feed us propaganda in favor of this lifestyle. Universities that should be open minded are anything but - if you don't agree, shut up and go home - you don't have the right to say that because it's racist/sexual prejudiced/politically incorrect or whatever the cause de jour is that week.

I'm not even sure I'm asking the right questions, much less be able to offer solutions.

2 comments:

Earl said...

Will go read what you recommended, nice about being older one doesn't have to try and be "sexy" and "young at heart", you can just enjoy the moments with those you love.

Bob said...

Any woman would be fortunate to be in a committed relationship with a guy like you. I know that I am extremely fortunate to have a wife like Colleen. How do I know? I was in two previous long-term relationships/marriages with women who do not hold a candle to her. I wish the same for you.